fabulous finals away messages

christina: F.I.N.A.L.S. = Fuck, I Never Actually Learned Shit

Nancy:
T'was the night before finals,
And all through the college,
The students were praying
For last minute knowledge.

Most were quite sleepy,
But none touched their beds,
While visions of essays
Danced in their heads.

I stared at my notes,
But my thoughts were all muddy,
My eyes went a'blur
I just couldn't study.

When all of a sudden,
Our door opened wide,
And Patron Saint Put-It-Off
Ambled inside.

"On Cliff Notes! On Crib Notes!
On Last Year's Exams!
On Wingit on Slingit!
and Last Minute Crams!"

Her message delivered,
she vanished from site,
But we heard her laughing
Outside in the night.

"Your teachers won't flunk you,
So just do your best,
Happy finals to All,
And to All, a good test."



if you have a fabulous finals away message, please send it to me, im always on the prowl for such fun things

random crap

hey kids. i was just sitting around thinking that i should update my blog. so here goes.

i went home this weekend to help with my church's christmas bazaar. but i left early to get some studying done. then me and my dad and my brother went over to my grandmother's house, which she is selling, to pick out what we want that she would otherwise throw away. i got two lamps and a funky cool 70's chair.

i also saw that new zorro movie with my mom, and it was really good. Antonio Banderes is the hottest thing EVER!!

upcoming coolness! candace is coming this weekend and i am SOOOO excited i cant wait. we're going to watch ELF 24 times and then go to short pump and shop and then go see the new harry potter movie. i am QUITE excited and cant wait. i said that before, but since its still true, ill say it again. I CAN'T WAIT!!!

i guess thats all thats new with me. ive got most of my christmas cards written and im pissed that the weather remains so warm, cuz i SO can't get into the holiday spirit if its 70 degrees. whatever, itll coole off soon i hope.

ok that all for now.

summer moments

ok so i kept a list of funny things and sayings over the summer, and then i lost it because well, im me. but i found it again today and i thought that the world would be a better place if i posted them all on the internet.
so here goes. all the things that i will never forget from this summer. not even after years of therapy.

"And then it was like, i'd had enough with the beet farmers" -Denise

"I have more legs than Bush country" -Ariel, as misheard by Janis

Going to the porn store and being stalked by the sales lady.

"Well, i dont do anal, cuz im gassy and i like to poop a lot" -Us quoting the porn star

Fireworks and boobs on cars

Guy puking on the metro coming home from the 4th of July

the "Murry/Making Love" talk with Mika

Civil War love letters from the front lines

Big Carrot guy at Relay for Life

"Do you like mustard" -Carrie Farson

Ariel: I'll bet you a Lincoln
Dad:....which ones Lincoln?
Mom: ya know, tall chap, big hat, married to the transvestite scandinavian with a creamy delicious filling...

"I wasn't hung over, i just felt like crap" -Ariel

"I hate shrimip. it tastes like...i dont know....butt" -Kari

"Well, drugs whores and jail do all kind of go together" -Mommy McGurk the sweetest old lady ever!

Janis is a Pirate

The Throne in whats her name's house

"When is Mike NOT oiled??" -Janis

Denise: I'm teasing them
Ariel: what, like letting them get to second base??

Icing sculptures at Friday's

Denise's musical thong

The Pact over the Holy Nachos

Painting of the Bed

"You are the fire in my pants. so drop yours." -Denise being a spanish hooker

Ass McLoudpants and green shirt guy

"Look out! Tooshy Squeeze!"

Our helper, Joe

Jesus is hot!

"Mika, GO TO HELL" -Steve Carell

"Welcome to the world. now heres some bowling shoes" -Denise

Mika: I'm going to eat this fake carrot
Janis: like....plastic?

"I liked her skirt, but when she took off her robe and revealed things dangling from her breasts i was like 'Oh My God!'" -Denise

"Oh did i tell you about the pen i stole from my GYN? it has an add for vaginal creme on it, and im going to give it to mike" -Janis

"hmmm....i either dropped it down my pants, or i didnt drop it at all..." -Janis

"aww, shes shy. she wants to go back home to her little Jew" -Janis' grandmother.


as you can probably tell, my friends and i were quite the quote machines this summer. twas a good time to be had by all, and though we missed mika whilst she was in Japan, she still had some funny quotes. man oh man. i hope you all enjoyed them as much as i did at the times. cool. peace out.

new song lyrics

sorry kids, i havent posted in MONTHS, but im posting now. although, its just more song lyrics. i guess i could talk about my fall break. i guess....maybe not. if you want to know about my fall break, just ask me. im pretty open about my fall breaks.

ok so this new song is from Lauren, and its by Jamie Cullum

"Twentysomething"
After years of expensive education
A car full of books and anticipation
I'm an expert on Shakespeare and that's a hell of a lot
But the world don't need scholars as much as I thought
Maybe I'll go travelling for a year
Finding myself, or start a career
Could work the poor, though I'm hungry for fame
We all seem so different but we're just the same
Maybe I'll go to the gym, so I don't get fat
Aren't things more easy, with a tight six pack
Who knows the answers, who do you trust
I can't even seperate love from lust
Maybe I'll move back home and pay off my loans
Working nine to five, answering phones
But don't make me live for Friday nights
Drinking eight pints and getting in fights
I dont want to get up, just let me lie in
Leave me alone, I'm a twentysomething
Maybe I'll just fall in love
That could solve it all
Philosophers say that that's enough
There surely must be more
Love ain't the answer, nor is work
The truth elludes me so much it hurts
But I'm still having fun and I guess that's the key
I'm a twentysomething and I'll keep being me

so thats my life right now, and if you didnt guess the subtext is "oh shit, what am i going to do with my life???" and thats basically what my mind is concentrating on. my mom wants me to get my ass in gear and apply for that internship with my aunt's company. and i know its a cushy deal, and i know that its probably what i want to do anyway, im just nervous that if i embrace the internship thing its like my childhood is officially dead and i have to start wearing pantyhose everyday and never have fun again ever. the end. its just like i would be embracing the Future. note the capital letter. whatever. i need to heed my mother and get this internship thing done. but ill keep being me. thank you Mr. Cullum!

finally an update

im sorry to any of you who have been reading my blog. i havent updated it in MONTHS and therefore some of the info is out of date.

my summer was insane! but fun. and also dull. how can a summer be both dull and insane. well, bits were dull, bits were insane, and all of it was fun!

media

i cant believe all those media morons are reading people's blogs on the air. i really think they are floundering for material, i mean come on folks. we already know you have good hair...let it drop.

rant for the day over.

im really excited about going to dessert with weber and kittle, and hopefully mileva. mileva has mondo work to do on a paper rewrite, so im not sure she can come. probably not.

im also quite excited about maybe being able to go to the HFStival this weekend. my brother knows someone who is playing, so denise and i might get tickets out of him. he told me not to get my hopes up too high, but we crossed that bridge a long time ago.

Once again we find our tragic heroine without a lover. things look bleak this time, as there are no prospects and little enthusiasm. she is tired of searching, and lays her her head down to rest a moment. Suddenly in a flurry of hoofbeats he comes. tall and beautiful, riding a white stallion. he gets off, looks deeply into her eyes and says, "Do you know where Heather lives?"

Last night i saw the baseball player. he was doing laundry, and i was helping becca and john do thier laundry. we were in the same room. at the same time, at one point we were even within 6 feet of eachother. it was incredibly cool. or rather, it would have been, except we didnt say a word to each other and i think im over him. i read his myspace, and he doesnt really sound like the guy for me. hes still incredibly cute though.

thats really all i had to say for now, if anyone wants to comment, please do! nobody comments on my friggen blog, and it annoys the crap out of me. sorry if this edition is a little rambly, i just woke up from a nap.

jungle madness

today we threw kittle a surprise jungle party to celebrate her going to africa this summer. it was MONDO fun, and it brought her to tears, so i think it was a success.

someone told me today that the guy i like has a girlfriend. this made me quite sad, since i dont want him to have a girlfriend. a wise woman told me, "it sucks, cuz when you like someone you feel like you have dibs on them, and then it turns out that someone else had dibs first."

true.

then, as if that wasnt bad enough, i saw him today. he was all dressed up and looking so freaking hot that i wanted to crawl into a hole and die. he is so beautiful and perfect and goofy and sweet, and he is all those things with someone else.

crap.